A simple trick to make life more enjoyable.

There are always things in life we don’t want to do or experiences we don’t enjoy. And what happens when it comes time to do them? We think “ugh, I have to do this!”

I have to do the dishes.
I have to go to work.
I have to get the baby to stop crying.
I have to work out.

You get the idea.

How often do you think this way? How crappy does it make you feel? I’ve found myself huffing and puffing while cleaning my house with a scowl on my face thinking to myself – I hate doing this!

And inevitably it is a terrible experience. I’m angry, frustrated, and just waiting for it to be over. That’s how I felt about my drive to work. Most of my work day. Grocery shopping. Paying bills.

When you stop to think about it, there are so many things we do in a day that we hate doing and end up being pissed off or bummed out that we have to do it.

Flip the script!

What happens when we change one word in the equation? How differently does it feel to think “I get to do the dishes” instead “I have to do the dishes”?

Sure, at first glance it sounds pretty lame. Who would be happy to do the dishes?!? But what this is doing is switching your thought process from a negative place to a positive one.

When you’re stuck thinking “Uff, I have to do the dishes”, you think about how much you don’t want to do it, how you’d rather be doing something else, how gross the collection of food in the drain is.

>>> That’s because your brain wants to find all the reasons to support that initial negative thought.

When you flip the script to “I get to do the dishes” your brain will automatically start scanning for reasons why this is true.

You might find yourself thinking “I get to do the dishes – I’m grateful my husband knows how to cook” or “it’s better than using paper plates and creating waste” or “I’ll really enjoy being in the house once the kitchen is clean”.

These new positive thoughts FEEL so much better and lighter than “ugh, I have to do the dishes!”

Now that I have a newborn, it’s easy to slip into negativity when he’s still crying and I just want to read this email, or go take a shower, or have a minute to myself.

A stupidly simple trick to make your life at least 10% more enjoyable

But when I find myself thinking “I have to help him to stop crying” I flip the script to “I get to help him to stop crying”. 

Because when I’m thinking “I have to…” I’m thinking of all the things I’d rather do, like not hear him cry, or be able to go do something else.

When I think “I get to…”, my mind automatically goes into a positive place while it’s trying to prove this statement to be true.

It’s a much better feeling and experience to think about how good I am at soothing him, or realizing that someday when he is upset it won’t be as simple to hold him close, shush and bounce with him to make him feel better. I’ll miss this moment someday.

That one simple word change helps us appreciate the little things. And life is a collection of little things. Best to enjoy them as much as we can.

A quick meditation to manifest an appreciation for the little things and make life more enjoyable

Get Started

Sit comfortably and close your eyes. Bring your attention to the present moment and inward to the sensations in your body.

Breath naturally and notice the feel and sounds of your breath. Stay here for a few minutes.

Relax any physical tension that is being held in your body. Soften your belly. Relax your face and jaw. Let your shoulders naturally relax down away from your ears.  

After You’re Settled

Think of one person from today who did something large or small that you appreciate.

Reflect on how that impacted your day in a positive way.

Let the feeling of appreciation and gratitude arise and fill your body and mind. Let it fall on your face with a slight smile.

With each breath, send this feeling of appreciation out to that person.

Notice how the energy of this gratitude resonates in your body.

Focus on this feeling with each breath.

When you cultivate the practice of gratitude, you may even find yourself able to be grateful for unpleasant or difficult experiences in life.

If you’d like, you can bring to mind an experience in your day or your life that was challenging. One for which you’d like to be able to express gratitude.

Bring back that sensation of gratitude and appreciation. Thank this challenge for what it may offer you or what you may have learned or gained.

Gratitude for your body, gratitude for your mind, gratitude for simply being alive at this moment.

Finally, appreciate the opportunity to pause and experience this very moment of gratitude in itself. For all that you have brought to mind during this meditation, for all of the countless gifts in your life, say, “Thank you.”

To all the people, all that is around you, all that you have experienced in your life, for all of this, “thank you”.

Allow the sense of appreciation to fill you every cell in your body as you breathe in and out.

We finish with a full, deep breath in. Slowly release that breath out. Gently blink your eyes open and bring your awareness back to your surroundings.

Create a habit of gratitude

Life throws us so many curve balls. It’s challenging, people don’t always do what we want them to do, and we don’t always get our way.

On top of that, we humans have a negativity bias. Our minds easily gravitate towards thinking negatively.

That’s why it’s so important to make gratitude a habit. You can do that by thinking of something you feel grateful for every morning right when you wake up, or before going to sleep.

You can also journal daily so that you can reflect back on the week to see just how many things you truly have to be grateful for.

You might also try expressing appreciation today to a person for whom you feel grateful.

Give these a try! They are sure to make your life more enjoyable!

Where to go from here:

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https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/is_gratitude_good_for_your_health