This is a video for my procrastinators who are also really, really hard on themselves because I completely know how you feel. I’ve come a really long way since then, and I’m going to share some knowledge with you.
One of the things is you very likely have been programmed to mostly respond to a negative motivation or negative reinforcement. And it’s just a strategy that’s not working out for you.
So you want to be able to learn positive motivation styles and to be able to motivate yourself positively with love and with self-respect. So here’s what you’re going to do.
Let’s take doing the dishes, for example, because doing the dishes absolutely sucks and nobody enjoys doing the dishes. What I want you to practice doing is you’re not doing the dishes for you because this is unpleasant.
I’m not doing this for me now. I’m doing this for future me. So what I want you to do is I want you to think about her in the future and tell her, you know what?
You deserve to be happy. I care about you and I want you to feel comfortable. You deserve to put your feet up and relax. I want you to think about sending her this little love letter.
You know what? I’m doing this. This is an act of service that I am doing for you because I care about you.
Now fast forward to the future and your dishes are already done. I want you to get in the habit of thinking back to your past self and thinking, oh, my God, I really appreciate that you did that for me. Thank you so much for having done that. You took one for the team and I really, really appreciate that.
See, now you’re hard on yourself. It can be really hard to say those loving and supportive things to you right now in the present moment.
So practice on future you and past you and creating this beautiful, loving, motivating relationship you have with future you and past you.
And that’s going to translate to present you so that you can say, you know what? I deserve to be happy and I’m going to do these things for myself and I’m going to feel proud of myself.
And you can step into this positive motivation style for yourself so that you can feel appreciated by you and motivate yourself with loving kindness as opposed to criticism. Drill Sergeant style.Negative motivation.
Research-Based Insight: Why You Procrastinate (It Has Nothing to Do With Self-Control)
Keep reading or watch this Reel to learn to stop procrastinating.
Unmasking Your Procrastination Patterns
Let’s start with a little self-discovery. Have you noticed that you tend to procrastinate more when you’re striving for perfection? Many of us procrastinators are also perfectionists. We delay tasks because we’re afraid they won’t turn out perfectly. But guess what? Perfectionism can be paralyzing.
Embracing Imperfection
Imagine this scenario: You have a mountain of dirty dishes in the sink, and the mere thought of tackling them sends shivers down your spine. Now, I know doing the dishes is nobody’s idea of a good time. But instead of framing it as a chore, I want you to shift your perspective.
Breaking Free from Negative Reinforcement
Here’s the real game-changer – ditching the negative motivation that’s been holding you back. You see, many of us have been wired to respond to negative reinforcement. Think about it: we often scold ourselves, beat ourselves up, and use criticism as our primary motivator. But let’s be honest – how well has that been working out for you?
Enter Positive Motivation
It’s time to flip the script. Instead of berating yourself to get things done, start motivating yourself with love and self-respect. I know, it sounds a bit woo-woo, but bear with me. We’ll take the dreaded dishes as an example.
A Love Letter to Future You
Next time you face the daunting task of doing the dishes, shift your focus. Tell yourself, “I’m not doing this for present me; I’m doing it for future me.” Visualize your future self, tired from a long day, coming home to a clean kitchen. Think about how happy and relaxed she’ll feel.
Now, here’s the fun part – write her a love letter, metaphorically or even literally. Say, “Dear future me, I’m doing this for you because you deserve to be happy. You deserve to put your feet up and unwind.” It might sound a bit quirky, but trust me, it works.
Gratitude for Past You
Fast forward to the future, and your dishes are miraculously done. Instead of dwelling on your procrastination tendencies, express gratitude to your past self. Think, “Wow, past me really took one for the team. Thank you for making future me’s life easier.”
You see, when you’re in the thick of procrastination, it can be challenging to be kind and supportive to yourself. But by practicing this loving and motivating relationship with your past and future selves, you’re laying the foundation for a more positive self-motivation style in the present.
The Transformation to Positive Motivation
So, why does this matter? Well, it’s all about shifting from being hard on yourself to saying, “I deserve to be happy.” It’s about doing things for yourself and feeling genuinely proud of your achievements. It’s about stepping into a positive motivation style that revolves around self-appreciation and kindness rather than self-criticism or a “drill sergeant” approach.
Now, don’t get me wrong; this isn’t a magical formula that will instantly erase procrastination from your life. Procrastination is a complex beast, and conquering it takes time and effort. However, by embracing self-love and positive motivation, you’re arming yourself with powerful tools to break free from its grip.
The bottom line
So, what’s next? Well, it’s time to put this positive motivation into action. Those dishes in the sink? They’re not just chores; they’re acts of self-love for future you. And as you build this loving relationship with yourself, you’ll find that procrastination loses its grip, and productivity becomes a friend rather than a foe.
Stay tuned for more insights on mastering procrastination and embracing self-love. Together, we’ll conquer procrastination one act of self-kindness at a time.
Where to go from here:
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