Here are two parenting tips that can help your kids feel safe and supported that work for me might work for you, too.
First off, I try not to say no as often as possible. If the answer really is no, then I might try to find a more clever way of saying no without using the words no. But also, I want to find more ways of saying yes.
Now, this activity (in the video below) for him as a three and a half year old is not particularly a safe thing for him to do by himself. Instead, I say yes because I am here and I can support you and keep you safe.
So he’s learning he can come to me as opposed to having to sneak around to do stuff like this.
Next, when he made it to the top the first time, he said, I’m scared, Mama. So I broke out Jen Hamilton’s very famous line, it’s okay to be scared because I’m not. That validated how he was feeling while giving him the safety and support for him to be able to show up and be brave in this moment. And he learned that being brave is doing something, even if it’s a little scary.
As parents, our ultimate goal is to provide a safe and supportive environment for our children to grow and flourish. Let’s remember that parenting is a journey, and what works for one child may not work for another. So, let’s explore these tips with an open mind, a touch of humor, and the understanding that authenticity and personalization are key.
It’s important to note that these parenting tips are not just based on personal anecdotes; they are supported by research. According to numerous studies, creating a supportive and responsive parenting environment contributes to positive child outcomes, including emotional well-being, self-esteem, and resilience. So, by implementing these strategies, you are setting your child up for long-term success and growth.
Keep reading or watch this Reel to know the two effective parenting tips for a safe and supported childhood.
Tip 1: Saying Yes More Often (Without Actually Saying No)
We all know that saying “no” is an essential part of parenting. However, I’ve discovered the power of finding clever ways to minimize the use of the word “no” while still maintaining clear boundaries. Instead of a straightforward “no,” consider alternatives that redirect or provide guidance. For example, if your child wants to engage in an activity that may not be safe for them to do independently, say “yes” to their desire while emphasizing your presence to support and keep them safe. By doing so, you create an atmosphere where your child feels comfortable coming to you for guidance, rather than resorting to sneaking around. It’s a win-win situation that fosters trust and open communication.
Tip 2: Validating Fear and Encouraging Bravery
Fear is a natural emotion, and it’s crucial for our children to understand that it’s okay to feel scared. When your child expresses fear or apprehension about a certain situation, embrace the opportunity to validate their feelings. Borrowing from the wise words of Jen Hamilton, a renowned parenting expert, you can say, “It’s okay to be scared because I’m not.” This simple statement acknowledges their emotions while assuring them of your presence and support. By providing this sense of safety, you empower your child to face their fears and cultivate bravery. They learn that being brave is not the absence of fear, but rather taking action despite the fear.
The bottom line
Parenting is a remarkable journey filled with challenges and triumphs. By saying “yes” more often and finding clever ways to set boundaries, we create an environment where our children feel supported and understood. Validating their fears and encouraging bravery teaches them invaluable life lessons. Remember, authenticity is key in parenting, and what works for one family may differ for another. So, embrace these tips, adapt them to suit your unique situation, and enjoy the beautiful adventure of raising confident and resilient children.
Where to go from here:
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